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VERY FUNNY: Why i got divorced.

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Why I got divorced.... Sad story of AKPOS !! Last week was my birthday....My wife
didn't wish me.... My parents forgot and so did
my kids.... I went to work.. Even my colleagues didn't wish me.. As I entered my cabin my secretary said, "Happy Birthday Boss".. I felt so special.... She asked me out to lunch.... After lunch, she invited me to her
apartment.... i felt she wanted s*x , without hesitating i agreed WE went there.... She said, "Do you mind if i go into the bedroom for a minute ?" "OKAY", I said.... She came out 5minutes later with a cake And My Wife, My Parents, My Kids,
My Friends & My Colleagues.... All Screaming, SURPRISE.... And . . . . .
I was waiting on the sofa Unclad....



A husband, his wife and their son, Akpos went out for lunch 2gether. The son was eating roughly and the following conversation took place between the father and his son. FATHER: You're eating like a small pig. Akpos: OK daddy. FATHER: Do you know what a small pig is? Akpos: Yes of course, son of a big pig.



A Drunk 18yrs old boy asked a
married woman out, d woman got
pissed, & told her hubby d
scenario. D husband told d
woman to invite d boy over so
that he could beat the hell out of him, he would hide under d bed
and wait 4 the boy. D woman did
as her hubby requested. When d
boy got there he kissed d woman
& took of his T-shirt & his body
was full of scars so d woman asked "why so many scars" d boy
replied"I like to lay with married
women & usually I get caught so I
kill d hubby's, If someone shows up now he'll be
No.20 on ma murder list" d boy
continued kissing d woman & d
woman tried to reach out to her
hubby under d bed & a small
voice came up "If u tell him am here, u'll see. LWKMD



A 7 year old daughter was looking
at her mother's driving license
card. It was written s*x:" F " ,
she then started laughing until the
mother asked why she was
laughing. The girl said "I can't believe you are so bad at s*x that
you even got an" F." Now I
understand why Daddy is always
with the nanny



PROSTITUTE: Oga U wan do?.. AKPOS: If only u go do am like my wife..
PROSTITUTE: Yes na! How she dey do am?..
AKPOS: She dey do am for FREE



Messi escorts a woman home for some fun. When they arrive to her bedroom, the woman says: ‘Make yourself comfortable, I’ll be right back’. When she returns she finds Messi and two other Unclad men on the bed, and she screams: 'What the hell is this '. Messi answers nervously: 'I'm sorry, but I can't perform without Xavi and Iniesta"



Ochuko: Akpos, why are you always on Facebook? Akpos: I like Facebook & I'm always there for one thing. It's the only place where you can like another man's wife without getting slapped.
Ochuko: So, what about Twitter, why are you always there too?
Akpos: Twitter is the only place you can follow another man's wife for free!




Akpos: Who is the biological father to Ogaga and Ejiro?.
Wife: What sort of stupid question is that?. You are their father.
Akpos: You better take those two kids to their father.
Wife: Honey, why do you say that they
are not your kids?.
Akpos: Because every night when they are about to pray before sleeping they will say: `OUR FATHER, WHO ART IN HEAVEN'
like this post for more...



One day Akpos was going home from school, on his way home, he met a man
and asked him ''Excuse me sir, what's the time?'' The man replied ''It's 15 mins to 4.00pm'' Akpos continued walking and told the man ''When 4.00pm reaches, you can Kiss my ass!'' The angered man started chasing Akpos so that he could beat the boy up for the
insult... He ran after him for about 2mins until they reached where a certain old man was seated... Akpos ran to the old man and
said ''Hey granny.. Look at this man... He
wants to beat me!'' The old man asked the young man who was chasing Akpos ''.... What's the problem man?'' The young man replied ''This little brat asked me what is the time and when I told him that it was 15 mins to 4.00pm, he told me that when 4.00pm reaches, I should kiss his ass!'' The old man paused and looked at his watch and told the young man ''But why are you in such hurry? You will have to wait 7 more minutes before you can Kiss his ass!''



Teacher: Who is a pharmacist? Akpos raised up his hand Teacher: So it is only Akpos that is the most intelligent student i have in this class? So there is nobody else to answer the question except Akpos? (There was no reply from the students) Teacher: Ok, now Akpos, use this cane and flog them ten strokes of cane each.
Akpos is full of happy and gave all the students ten hot strokes of cane....
Teacher: Oyaa my dear Akpos tell this dumb students who a pharmacist is...
Akpos: A Pharmacist is a farmer who assist people.
The Teacher fainted.


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